What do you guys think of my comedy sketch i just came up with?

Yo what is with kids today and their crazy trends?I saw a kid walkin around yesterday with a mohawk.Who gets a mohawk in this day and age?Probably just some poser who thinks he檚 some cool ************ ya know?.Nah. I...uh.....i love my mohawk.Old folks give me dirty looks and parents hold their kids closer when they檙e near me-I love it.Finally, a way to scare people off without having to use the energy to open my mouth.It檚 like a gift from god, really.

Drugs:

Yeah, I檓 around weed alot.But i can檛 help it.I really can檛, ya know?It檚 not my fault though, I mean........It檚 everywhere.......on the streets, in movies......uhh..........in.............?hand, baking in my oven, growing in my backyard.........I really can檛 escape the stuff.And I know a lot of parentss out there are pretty edgey on the whole subject.

My advice to parents who comittted the shameful act of smoking weed as kids?Lie.Because without your trust, they will grow up better people......or.......at least.......that seems to be the golden rule.......right?

God, my parents must want me dead right now,

But seriously, addiction is a very serious matter.......I remember it pretty well .....i remember my uhh...........my addiction .....to........ headies.Took me a while to get back to the midgrade ****.Had to take classes for it.Thank god for their twelve step program.';Ain檛 got the cash?Downgrade the stash';

And whats with the funny look i檓 gettin for pickin up my copy of high times at the bookstore?Motherfuckers just give me this look.I檓 like';I only read it for the production values';.





I檓 a big supporter of NORML.That檚 the uh......National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws.Of course, my beliefs differ slightly from their檚.They believe marijuana shouldn檛 be smoked behind the wheel.....but lets be honest........music is just way too good to be enjoyed sober, especially when doing something as monotonous as driving around. They say it slows reaction time, sure, but so does reading the speed limit sign........the point is......it檚 a fair trade, and I would happily risk the lives of myself and others to get the full effect out of my Cream CD.





Well....all of this is just a prime example of how an innocent child like me can become a slave to the menacing narcotic known as marijuana.

So parents out there-I檓 tellin ya?Keep your kids away from that **** it檚 bad news.Instead buy them a new set of glue or keep the Robitussin sitting out.Better to let your child OD from household items than to have him/her destroy the sanctity of the family unit by inhaling the evil fumes of that entirely illegal plant.Because lets be honest, we檇 rather our kids OD and die from household items than let tham have to live with the shame of knowing they once got high on reefers.



Its funny though.I mean, if a kid really wants to get high these days....and I mean really needs to get high....guess what he can do?.......Kids today are now pissing and shitting in plastic bags, and fermenting them in the hot sun for days to a week and inhaling the fumes from it and they actually trip.They trip for hours off this ****(literally).I call it **** sniffing, but it檚 more commonly reffered to as just plain........well......sniffing ****.Pretty ****** up isn檛 it?Ya know who I blame?You.Every parent out there who has discouraged or bypassed an explaination of safe drug use.Yes.It檚 all your fault kids have discovered these discgusting ways of getting high. Your suburban idealogies have backfired on you once again.Congratulations, because its because of you that we now have kids choking themselves to get high.







Electoral ****:

Yeah.The electoral race is getting pretty heated right now. I檓 a little dissapointed though . Everyone檚 platform seems to be ';change';.Now I know as well as most do that Americans are stupid , but my god. What the **** kind of platform is that?Hillary says we need change.Obama says we need change.Anybody remember what happened in germany in 1939?Yup.That ******* culprit, ';change';.......Which is why I檓 voting for Ron Paul. Cause at the end of the day, the *****, the bully, and the brother just ain檛 cuttin it.

I love John Mccain though.';Let us Win'; ..................Mr Mccain, you can檛 win the war on terror.Wanna know why?Because terror......ain檛 a ******* people.

See?It檚 just like the war on drugs, which I檝e also been told we檙e fairly close to winning.

You think the dumbasses in Washington could have at least come up with a better name for this war, like........the ';War on Americans';.Cause thats what it really is when you think about it. They檙e breaking the law everyday to spend mine and your hard earned money destroying......and then rebuilding a country that never threatened our ';freedom'; in the first place.

But I digress......John Mccain is just a third Bush and if you檙e thinking of voting for him, you need to be taken to a dark room and shot in the face.



Religion:

I檓 not a big fan of religion, either.I was raised Jewish and I檓 proud to be, but I don檛 study it anymore.Honestly, it檚 a phase.It檚 all a phase.For some people, that phase lasts their entire life, but thankfully I matured relatively early on.But ya know what?I still get a lot of crap about the whole jesus thing .I remember a kid angrily telling me once ';you jews killed jesus';.I looked at him, held my hands up and said ';what can i say? butterfingers';.Haha. No but jesus was a good guy.Got a little too attached to that cross though, but otherwise, a good guy.What do you guys think of my comedy sketch i just came up with?
real funny, jack*$$

yea, thats my script.

lemme tell u something,-if ur ever a heckler in my audience, I'll rip you a new @$$hole, buddy.What do you guys think of my comedy sketch i just came up with?
wow
hahahaha.



Bet ';Josh R'; is pretty happy about this...
a few small chuckles, but nothing really funny