Sometimes I wonder why I miss you, and why I still love you. You're a totally different person than the guy I fell in love with in high school. You're a completely different person now... Your personality has changed along with your appearance. You aren't the same sweet Logan that bought me a bear and a box of chocolates on Valentine's day when we made up all those years ago. I can tell you've started drinking a lot, and I hope you haven't moved on to worse things... As I write this, I look back at the old days and they make me smile. The days when you would come up to my work and we would stand outside and talk for hours... The days when things were still perfect. I remember hanging out with you and the twins. When they come to see me, I wish they would bring you with them.
But you moved away. I remember the night before you left, how we sat there for hours at the beach in your truck holding hands and talking. I was so sad that you were leaving, and so were you. I remember that big old black Ford. It was your Dad's, you got it when you got hit by the semi in your little Chevy... I was so worried, I'm surprised you made it.
And you came back. You didn't like college, and you missed me. You wanted to surprise me, so you had my best friend park beside your new Mustang. ';Look who it is!'; And I saw those bright blue eyes and your amazing smile staring up at me from in your car. You were back, and we were happy. But you were different. And so was I. But things went back to the old days, and everything was great again. Until that one night at Krista's house.
I never liked it when you were like that... I hated it when you drank, it changed you into someone else. I still say it wasn't your fault, it was the alcohol. You don't remember, and I pretend it didn't happen. From then on, things got just kept getting worse... all the stupid fights, the things we said... We didn't really mean them, did we?
I always wonder what would happen if we never went that night... But maybe it's for the best.
You still talk to me from time to time, just to see how I'm doing or to tell me what's going on in your life. I want to tell you that I still love you, and to see if you want things to still be how they used to be. but I know that's not a good idea.
I miss those blue eyes, how you kiss me at night.... I miss the way we sleep.
I feel better now that it's all out. Wasn't looking for any type of insight or commentary, but feel free to comment if you like. I just needed to get it out.Letters to Logan....?
Not that I mind you posting this, (feel free to), but:
Wouldn't it be more helpful to show this to Logan, maybe? Or at least make your own, personal diary? :)Letters to Logan....?
You need to get something out, start a journal. Yahoo Answers isn't the place for your whiny diary entries.
:'(
I'm hoping that your post isn't going to be pulled for ';not being a question or an answer';, but this is the type of thing which would work better in a blog -- and given how well you write, it might end up being a frequently-visited blog.
u should give this to logan
you could write this in a diary or on a blog site, or just give it to Logan.
start a blog. that's what i did. now i have an open forum to post my thoughts and the stuff i don't want my friends on facebook to see. It's free to start a blog.
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